I have constantly prayed that God would rewire my brain to remove the conditioning I have been exposed to my entire life. That conditioning is from every TV, radio, and written advertisement I have ever seen, heard, or read, which has conditioned me to see women as sexual objects.
And after constantly praying that God remove this sexually oriented thinking, do you know what he said to me? (Of course, you don’t- how could you?)
He said this: “Sorry, but it doesn’t work that way.”
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I realized that what God was saying was not that he won’t help me, but that there are certain things we need to work on, ourselves, and that he is there to guide us with his Torah and his Ruach (spirit), but we need to make the effort.
So, I am still working on this, but please don’t get the idea that I am some dirty, old man who is addicted to porn. No, siree! far from it- all that I am subject to is a propensity to observe a woman and see only her attractiveness, and not the way God sees her.
I heard once on a radio ministry program that there is a difference between looking and lusting: looking is quickly observing and lusting is when you go back for a second look. I think it should also include how long that first look lasts.
I think if we are to be honest with ourselves, we all fall into this category, now and then, when we take a good, long look at someone. And it’s not always lusting for a man to look at a beautiful woman, or for women to look at a very handsome man.
There is also a difference between looking and leering.
So, what I do when I see a physically attractive woman is to remind myself that I am allowed to appreciate God’s gift of beauty, and then make sure that I turn my head away.
Especially if I happen to be driving at that time!
(“Wow- she’s great looking…BAM!!)
Here’s my way of approaching this issue: Look, but don’t leer; appreciate the beauty, but don’t lust. And after that first, short look, turn away and don’t look back.
I believe if we can do that then we are not violating Yeshua’s lesson about lusting with the eyes.
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That’s it for today, so l’hitraot (which means “Until we see each other, again”) and Baruch haShem! (literally, “Bless the Name”, which we Jews say to mean “Blessed be God”.)
