Tag: children

A Personal Strife You May Have Gone Through, Too

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Many of us who have accepted Yeshua as our Messiah, and have turned back to God, have been ostracized by not just friends but by our family, as well.

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I have two children, from a previous life which I may have mentioned this in the past, who were constantly exposed to my “ex” verbally battering me whenever I visited them. She even did that when I wasn’t there, and after many years of this, my children grew up to accept her version of who I am and had rejected reject me, totally.

Every day since then I have prayed that God would reconcile my children to me, and every year for over 10 years I wrote both my daughter and son on their birthday asking to reconcile. About a year and a half ago, when I wrote to my son on his birthday, he replied that he wanted to start over. I was elated and knew that this was an answer to my daily prayers. We had emailed each other a number of times and also we have had pleasant conversations using the video app on Instant Messenger. Everything seemed to be getting better.

This week I replied to a couple of his posts and those of his girlfriend and his replies were not just nasty, but degrading and insulting. I went back and asked why he is being so nasty, and that if he can’t disagree with me he doesn’t have to say anything at all. I sent him a personal message saying that I don’t deserve to be talked to that way and I am still his father, who deserves some respect. I said I wasn’t his punching bag.

His reply was that he has been thinking about it and he doesn’t respect me, which is why he was lashing out at me. He added he doesn’t want to respect me and that we should separate permanently. He also unfriended me and blocked me before I could even respond.

I am not sharing this to hear people say how sorry they are; the reason I am sharing is that this being a ministry, there is an important message here about answers to prayer, and raising the question if praying may sometimes be a waste of time.

As of this moment, because this is how they want it, both my son and daughter are dead to me. It isn’t my choice, it is theirs, and as sad and painful as it is, I will respect their wishes. And to tell you the truth, it is somewhat of a relief because they have insulted and berated me constantly for over 20 years.  I spent most of my time turning the other cheek, realizing that this was their mother’s hatred which she infused into their innocent minds as they were growing up, but at 33 and 28 years of age, they are more than old enough now to make up their own minds.

I prayed to God for many years to be reconciled with them, and with their mother, as well, and after my son said he wanted to reconcile, I thanked God every day for that answer to prayer. I continued to pray for my daughter to turn back to me, as well. But now that my son has, completely out of the blue, rejected me again, how can I trust God to answer prayer?

The answer is that God DID answer my prayers, but he won’t force people to change who they are. Somehow, someway, God influenced my son to turn back to me, and despite my efforts to tip-toe around him for the past year and a half, he returned to the disrespectful, hateful, and angry person that his mother is, inside of him.

In looking back, I really can’t see how I did anything to anger him- even Donna, my wife, said my responses were not at all written in any way to be construed as nasty or insulting, but he just did a complete “180” and now things are back to where they used to be.

Except for one thing- I am not praying for them anymore.

Now, some of you may be thinking I should pray even harder, and I can understand the reasoning behind that; after all, Yeshua told us to pray for our enemies. He also said that we shouldn’t throw pearls before swine. Most people interpret that as not wasting time preaching to those who won’t listen, and that is the correct interpretation, but I am adding my own twist to it.  I believe that there are some people for whom intercessory prayer is inappropriate. You can pray and pray, but since God will not change who a person is unless they ask him to, it might just be a waste of time.

I believe that prayer for people who are not just godless, but God-hating is a waste of time. For our own emotional protection, we have to learn to allow people to make their own decisions even when we know where that decision will take them. As painful as it is, sometimes we have to cut our losses and move on, and the only consolation I can find from this is that what I am doing is also what God does.

Today’s lesson is that my experience with my children is similar to what happens to God, every day when people reject him. God wants everyone to turn from their sin and live (Ezekiel 18:23), but when they reject him he will allow them to live their lives on their own. Even though he knows the pain and eternal suffering they will have to endure because of their choice.

So taking God’s example, I am removing my children from my life, as they have requested, and I won’t pray for them, but I won’t reject them if they turn back to me. The ball is now entirely in their court.

God will turn his face from those who ignore and hate him, but he will never give up on them and is always happily willing to take them back the moment they do teshuvah. And that is the hope we can have for those whom we love and care for but who reject us.

Thank you for being here and please subscribe, share, and comment if you feel you have anything to add to this message.

Until next time, L’hitraot and Baruch HaShem!

 

ADDENDUM: It is now three days later, and I am adding this because as I prayed this morning before I even knew it I was praying for my children. I realized that when I wrote the above message, I neglected one factor: when we pray, and we are praying genuinely from the heart, the Ruach HaKodesh (Holy Spirit) will help lead us in the prayer. And what I learned is that it is always right to pray for someone, even when you are pretty sure that they will never change.

So I learned this morning  and wanted to add to this message, that when you ask yourself “Should I pray for this so-and-so?”, my answer is something my people always say: “Vat could it hoit?“

Too Early to Know

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I was reading Dear Abby this morning and a 16-year-old girl wrote in how she and another boy, one year older than her, like each other but the boy wasn’t ready for a relationship. This, of course, is driving the girl crazy.

Here’s what drove me a little crazy about this issue: she says the boy is a transgender boy.

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He is only 17 years old!! She wasn’t female long enough to even know what being a female is all about, and yet the parents, as well as the legal system, has allowed this child to sexually mutilate herself into himself and take mind-altering, as well as physiological altering, drugs just because she “thinks” she should be a he before she or he has even finished puberty!!

Now wait a minute…before anyone who is a member of the LGBTQ community jumps down my throat, this is NOT a judgment on your lifestyle or sexual/gender identification, or your rights.  That is not the issue here.

The issue is that a child of 16 or 17, and certainly one much younger, is not mature enough, either physically, emotionally or socially, to make a life-changing decision such as changing their gender. Even with psychological counseling, they are just too damn young and (life) inexperienced to make such a drastic decision.

We don’t let them drink alcohol or smoke cigarettes until they are 21, and they can’t even vote until they are 18. So if these simple decisions that are reversible during their lifetime are considered too difficult a decision for them to make until they are of legal age, why can pre-pubescent children be allowed to alter their gender?

I believe the parents who allow this should be charged with child abuse and the doctors should have their licenses revoked and charged with malpractice. No child of 16 or 17 is able to make a sound, mature and experienced decision about which gender they identify with.

And anyone who disagrees is, in my opinion, saying that only as a defense mechanism, without a care at all for the child’s welfare. They disagree only because they want to support an agenda that is not really being questioned here.

This country allows drag queens to read to toddlers in public libraries- libraries that receive their funding from the community. These innocent children are too young to even know what morals are, let alone have enough life experience to know what a drag queen really is. To them, these men are no different than a circus clown all dressed up. But there is a BIG difference- those men dressed as women are not clowning around.

I know gay people and have family members who are gay and have never once judged them, even though I know what God says and don’t agree at all with their lifestyle. But right or wrong, sinful or not, a sex change operation is such a drastic event that it must be prohibited until such time as the person requesting it is of legal age and has shown enough life experience and emotional maturity for a panel of experts to determine that this person is making an informed decision.

God has been removed from our courts and schools and replaced with politically correct sinfulness, moral depreciation, and fear of being labeled as someone not tolerant or compassionate.  I know prayer is a powerful weapon, but even in the Bible we read how both the Northern, and later the Southern Kingdoms had committed such horrible sins, and for so long, that God was past hearing their prayers and was on his throne of judgment.

I believe that America is in the same place that Shomrom was in after King Ahab, which a few hundred years later Judea was in after King Manasseh.

We have been sinning too much and too long for prayer to wash us clean, and the only thing left to us now is judgment.

God made us the way we are and if someone wants to change what God did, then they will have to deal with God on their own. And whether or not you believe in transgender sex operations, no one should be able to do that to themselves until they are at least of legal age, as well as having shown enough maturity, experience, and understanding of the consequences of their actions to demonstrate they really know what they are doing.

And no teenager can do that.

Thank you for being here and please subscribe. I welcome your comments and until next time, L’hitraot, wash your hands,  and Baruch HaShem!

Parashah Vayyera (And he appeared) Genesis 18 – 22

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We begin with Abraham sitting under the terebinths just chilling out when three men (who are really angels) appear to him. He performs the usual act of kindness that was culturally expected of him, asking them to stay, wash their feet and giving them food and drink. After partaking of his hospitality, one of the three tells him that next year Sarah will have given birth to a boy. Sarah laughs (hence the name Yitzchak, which means “to laugh”) and as they leave one of them tells Abraham what is to happen to Sodom and Gomorrah.

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Abraham, thinking of Lot, pleads with the angel not to destroy the cities if there are but 50 righteous men found there, and the angel agrees. Abraham manages to negotiate down to saving the city for the sake of just 10 righteous men, but there weren’t even that many.

The angels find Lot and are invited to his house overnight, but the men of the city come to force the strangers to participate in homosexual sex  (hence the term “sodomize”), and to prevent that Lot offers his two virgin daughters instead. Before anything can happen, the men of the city are struck blind by the angels, who tell Lot to get out of Dodge now. Lot delays until the early morning and is forcibly taken out, with his daughters and his wife. The wife lags behind and looks back, which results in her being turned into a pillar of salt, while Lot escapes the destruction with his two daughters,

They live in a cave and the daughters get him drunk so that without his knowledge they sleep with him, one daughter one night and the other daughter a second night. They are each impregnated and their children give rise to two of the ancient enemies of Israel, the Ammonites and the Moabites.

Meanwhile, Abraham is moving on, as well, and settles near the kingdom of Abimelech.  As he had done in Egypt, he asks Sarah to pretend to be his sister and when Abimelech sees her, he takes her for himself as a wife. He never approaches her and God comes to him in a dream, warning him against doing anything to Sarah because she belongs to Abraham. God tells the king to have Abraham pray for him, and eventually, Abraham and Abimelech swear an oath of friendship and Abraham secures his rights to a well he dug, the Well of Seven (Beer-Sheva.)

The final chapter of this parashah is called the Akedah, the Binding of Isaac. This is one of the earliest and best known Messianic references since Abraham is asked to sacrifice his only son, indicating the future sacrifice of the Messiah by God. We all know the story: Abraham takes Isaac to a place God tells him about, which is Mount Moriah. Isaac is bound and placed on a pyre, and just as Abraham is about to kill him, an angel calls from heaven to stop. God tells Abraham that because of this act of faithful obedience, the promises he has made will be fulfilled. Abraham sees a ram stuck by its horns in a bush, and sacrifices that to God (which is why the ram’s horn is the preferred horn to be used for the Shofar.)

I am interested in the situation with Lot’s two daughters who escaped with him. We read in Genesis 19:14 that Lot went to his sons-in-law to ask them to join him in leaving the city, so it seems that Lot also had two married daughters. Sadly, they and their husbands did not take Lot seriously when he told them the city would be destroyed. Those daughters had become subjects of their environment, choosing to reject salvation in order to remain in the sinful city, despite the fact that their father told them of the coming destruction.

The two daughters who escaped with Lot performed a heinous act by seducing their own father in order to make sure that his bloodline continued. They were true “daughters of Sodom” and by their actions demonstrated not only were they comfortable with the sexual perversity of the place where they grew up but that they also had no faith in God.

Abraham was truly unique, growing up in a paganistic environment, yet knowing and believing in the one, true God. His environment didn’t affect his righteousness or his morals. However, even though Lot was raised by Abraham, a righteous man, Lot did not learn anything from Abraham. Abraham was humble and generous, but Lot was self-centered and selfish. We can see this when Abraham asked Lot to choose where he will settle, and Lot chose the best possible land, despite its proximity to the sinful city of Sodom.  Lot married into this culture and allowed his daughters to also marry into the culture of Sodom, whereas Abraham made Eliezer promise to get a wife for Isaac from his own people, even though it was a fair distance away (Genesis 25:20.)

Are we allowing our children to be influenced by their environment to the point where they might accept sin over our advice? Are we careful to watch what they see on TV and in the movies? To control which video games they play? To know who their friends are and what their parents are like?

I was not able to raise my children, who lived with their mother two states away. Although I tried to see them every weekend, I was unable to influence them because the few hours I spent with them couldn’t overcome the “24/7/365” their mother had with them. Eventually, because I tried to show them the right way to act and get them to know God, which was against what their mother had been doing, my efforts resulted in them cutting me out of their lives. Thanks be to God, I have reconciled with my son, but his older sister still has nothing to do with me, despite my earnest pleas in a letter to her every year on her birthday. And it kills me that I have not been able to save their eternal souls by teaching them how to overcome their environment.

I see young people today that are totally blinded by technology and trust what they are exposed to by the Internet and the media, which are tools of Satan. Satan is the prince of the power of the air (Ephesians 2:2) and that is how what our children see and hear every day is delivered to them. Too many parents today are more concerned about being a friend to their child than being a parent, and the Bible is clear that without proper discipline, a child will not be saved (Proverbs 23:14.)

You may say that in today’s world it is impossible to prevent a child from being exposed to the sins and perversity of the world, and you would be correct. So how do we keep them from being absorbed into this culture of corruption?

By example. Parents, uncles, aunt, grandparent, friend…whatever relationship you have with a child, you must be an example of righteousness. Even if you are fearful of losing that child’s love or companionship, you must present yourself as an example of proper moral and spiritual living. The Bible tells us that if we bring up a child in the way they should go, they will remain in it (Proverbs 22:6); personally, I find this not to be true in every case. I am sure Abraham was an excellent example to Lot, and we know how that turned out. However, that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t try.

You never really know in which way you are influencing a child until they grow up. I know many of the things I found uncomfortable and annoying about my parents ended up being good for me. And I didn’t realize this until I was fully grown, and appreciated it, even more, when I had children of my own.

Lot wasn’t a good example to his daughters, and what resulted from that was his children became sworn enemies of his uncle’s children. Eventually, the descendants of Lot (children raised to accept sinfulness) were destroyed by the descendants of Abraham (those raised to obey God.)

It’s never too late to start being righteous or to teach your children to obey God. I believe that the world is overpowering the youth of today, influencing them in a way that makes it very difficult for parents to fight against. When I was a child, we didn’t have anything that was as powerful an influence as the Internet, TV, movies and the media are today. The parents of today have an especially hard job when it comes to keeping their children “clean” because there is really no way, other than physical isolation, to prevent our kids from being exposed to the sinfulness of the world.

The only chance our children have is for us to be the kind of example that will shine so brightly and make such a lasting impression on them that even if they should stumble and fall victim to the world, they will always have in their memory the image of righteousness that might, one day, bring them out of the dark and back into the light.

Be the best example of righteousness you can be, keep vigilant, keep watching what they do, and keep praying to God for the spiritual and physical protection of your children. Just as Yeshua prepared and warned his Talmudim before sending them out into the world, we must do the same for our children.

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I wish you Shabbat shalom, and until next time, L’hitraot and Baruch HaShem!

A Real Life Example of How Patient Prayer Works

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If you have been to the About Steve page on my website you would have read that children have kicked me out of their lives, and how I have been praying fervently every day for reconciliation. I have always stated I know it is, ultimately, a choice my children have to make, and I appreciate and am thankful for whatever God can do to help them make that choice.

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I say it that way because I know God will not force someone to love or forgive- he will give us plenty of opportunities, he will send angels and people in our path to help steer us to that goal, but he will not force anyone to do something.

On each of the birthdays of my children, I send them a letter or email. My daughter doesn’t have an email address I know of, so I send her a letter, and my son has an email.  I sent my son his birthday greeting and (as usual) a request to please reconcile last October (2018). As always, I said a little prayer over that communique before I sent it.

Last week I was checking my email and guess what was there? That’s right- an email from my son saying all the things I had been praying he would say. We have exchanged some emails since then, I am getting caught up on what he has been doing (it has been nearly 6 years since we last spoke) and he seems to be much more open to having a relationship than ever before.

I will be taking this step-by-step because I don’t want to ruin things, again. I am pretty sure what I had done in the past to help alienate him, and although I was trying to do what I thought best for him, even at my own expense, clearly I could have done whatever it was I wanted to do in a better way. I will do my very best not to make that mistake again.

Even though we are not of the same belief regarding God and Messiah, he is willing to read my books which I am sending to him today.

So, prayer works! Not always the way you want it to, not always like you want it to, and almost never when you want it to, but overall….it works.

In fact, it works even on those who don’t necessarily believe in God, so long as the one praying does.

I am so happy that my son has returned to me that I had to share this today with you, as encouragement to all of you out there still waiting for an answer to your prayers. Be patient, keep on asking, and faithfully trust that even if you don’t see any results, God is working on it for you.

 

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Until next time, L’hitraot and Baruch HaShem!

Parashah Ha’azinu (Give ear) Deuteronomy 32

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As we come to the final chapters of the Torah, we find Moses finishing his service to the nation of Israel (and to God) with a song,  just as he did after crossing the Red Sea, when he was just starting.

This “Song of Moses” is both a stern chastisement and a promise of hope for the future. He recounts how God has been faithful, loving and generous, forgiving over and over the sins of the child who was given everything and has shown only rebelliousness and rejection. Moses tells of the way God has taken care of Israel, and all Israel has done, in return, is reject and rebel.  Moses further tells them what will happen in the future, how their rebellion will be punished, but ends with the hope of salvation and, eventually, the promise that God’s loving presence will return once the nation returns to God.

There’s an old song called, “We Always Hurt the Ones We Love.” I often think how many times, over the millennia, have we hurt God. When I say “we”, I don’t mean Believers, or Jews, I mean “we”- i.e., everyone. Believers, non-Believers, Jews, Christians, Buddhists, New Wavers, Skin-heads, whatever and whomever; in other words, people. Just plain people, no matter what their spiritual beliefs.

All people are God’s children, and we all hurt Him when we reject Him. Really, no one likes being hated or rejected; no one likes having those they love turn their faces away as they approach. No one likes being told, “You have no place here!”; and when you think about it, that is exactly what this nation, America, has told God. We have told Him that He has no place in our schools, no place in our courts, and no place in our work areas.

If we, as simple human beings with limited capacity to love, don’t like these things, can you imagine how much it must hurt the Lord when He is the object of derision?

To be even more direct, when it comes to rejection of God and hurting Him by not obeying His laws and commandments, which He gave us so that we will live and be happy, I should be saying how I have hurt Him. Yes, we have, but I have, too. I have disobeyed, I have done wrong in His eyes, I have rejected Him, and I can’t feign ignorance because I do know better!

Through 40 years in the desert, the children of Israel had God with them always; a cloud by day and fire by night, feeding them, watching over them, yet all the time they kept ignoring Him. They took advantage of Him, they grew (as Moses says in his song) fat and kicking (to represent an over-fed ox that won’t take the yoke) and yet God still remained with them and took care of them.

I can understand how God must have felt because I have two children (from a previous life) that I visited when they were growing up and living with their mother. I drove from Philadelphia to Queens, NY every weekend at first,when they were just 6 and 1. Then, as they got older (and I got older, too) I went every other week, then eventually my daughter rejected me and, finally, after child support was over and my son was in college, he rejected me, too. This was, of course, partially my fault, but in honesty it was mostly their mother’s hatefulness that she force-fed them their whole lives, addicting them to ADHD drugs  (they were never diagnosed by a medical professional) and filling them up with half-truths and complete lies, using them as weapons to get back at me for leaving the marriage.

Despite the cruel, disrespectful and hateful things they constantly did and said to me, I still kept going back for more. Why? Because  I’m some sort of saint? No way. Because it made me feel good to be yelled at and insulted? I don’t think so. Maybe because there was a monetary reward for it? C’mon! I used to drive an extra hour or two just to avoid tolls when I first started seeing them, and when I did have some money I spent it on movies, or archery, or breakfast, or anything to get them out of the house (the mother never took them anywhere); we went to the City (New York City, of course) and visited museums, we went to parks, we went to events, etc., all of which cost money.

Never, ever did I get so much as a “Gee, thanks Dad! That was really fun!” Not even close. In fact, usually we ended up in an argument that was created long before I ever got there- they were primed and ready for me before I even picked them up.

So, nu? Why did I keep going back? I kept going back because they are my children and I love them. Even now, all I want is to be reconciled with them.

I am not telling you this for any pity or remorse- please, that is not the point. I have God, what else could I possibly need to give peacefulness to my soul? And I have forgiven them, mother and children, because that is what we are expected to do.

No, the point is that I can understand how God feels. Anyone, any of you reading this, who have ever loved and not had that love returned, knows (at least) a little bit how God feels when His loving kindness and compassion is returned with rejection.

And when we try to tell God how He is supposed to feel, such as people who say, “Oh, that’s OK because God will forgive me” or “It isn’t that important- God didn’t really mean that”  or even worse, “I don’t really believe in God: it’s all just a made-up story”, I can only imagine how much God wants to just shake them up a little; maybe throw some lightening, drop a fireball or two, possibly split the earth under their feet. You know, just a little wake-up call to let them know, “Hey- I am here, and I AM!”

But that’s not His style, and I can say that because He has shown us His ways throughout the Tanach. Yes, He has thrown fire now and then, and He has shown His majesty and power through miraculous events, but overall He has let others, humans, perform the work in order to have His plans come to fruition.

There are so many ways we can accept that God exists, everyday miracles we see all around us, but we refuse to accept the truth of His existence, and thereby, reject Him. That is what Moshe (Moses) is telling the Israelites in his song. And he calls heaven and earth as witnesses.

God is here; He always has been here, is here this very instant, and He will be here always. Here- just within reach, always reaching out to you, always wanting to be in communion with you, always willing to forgive you when you do T’shuvah (repent), always loving you with a love that is so complete and overwhelming that you can never fully grasp the depth of it.

That is what Moses is telling the people, and that is the hope we have, each of us, every day. God is not there- He is here! He has never left, and He will always be close enough to touch.

All we have to do is reach out.

Texas Supreme Court made the correct decision

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WHAT??? Steve- are you saying that you are pro-abortion?

No. I am not for abortion- it is murder. What I am “for” is common sense, and to expect that a court of law in America is going to uphold a godly position is not sensible.

From a strictly “civil” point of view, it is illegal to force or coerce someone to make a decision that regards their individual rights. In America, like it or not, a woman has a legal right to have an abortion, within the limitations of the law. Those limitations are based partially upon the premise that the abortion does not risk the health of the mother. The Texas Supreme Court said the laws they ruled against were not designed to protect the health of the mother, but simply to make getting an abortion legally more difficult. That is a coercive measure which impede’s a woman’s personal rights, and it is illegal.

Again, from a strictly legal viewpoint, the court made the correct decision.

We, as Believers, cannot expect to have a government formed by humans to be a godly one. If you do, you’re a fool. In fact, as Believers, we should not want any man-made government; we don’t want a representative republic (that is we have in America-if you thought it was a democracy, technically it isn’t), we don’t want socialism, communism, despotism or dictatorships. What we want is a Theocracy- a government that is led by God.

After the Exodus, God ruled the people, with divinely appointed prophets to be His representatives on earth. God ruled through the Prophets, and we saw how He empowered them with miracles and wisdom. This is the Theocracy that all Believers should want and be waiting for.

When Yeshua returns to reign, we will have what we want.

But that is not what we have now, and don’t think that this is a recent event. Read 1st Samuel, Chapters 9 through 12. Samuel appoints a king, which is what the people have been craving. And in Chapter 12, after Saul is established as king and Samuel is ready to go the way of all things, he really lets the people have it. He tells them, in no uncertain terms, how horrendous a sin they have committed against God by asking for a king, and how they will suffer for putting a human over them instead of God.

Since then, history has proven Samuel correct.

In the meantime, we are bound by Torah, by Yeshua’s command, and by legal statute to honor and obey the existing government. All those in power are there by God’s approval, and they will perform His will, whether they know it or not, sooner or later. God’s plan is the one that will survive and be fulfilled.

If you are expecting the United States government, whether federal or civil (meaning state) to initiate and pass laws that are in accordance to God’s laws regarding the rights of the unborn, then all I can say to you is…get real, People!” Governments that are formed by humans will have human laws and be based on human desires and emotions. Godly things, you know, like compassion, respect for others, love, fairness to all, and respect for the Torah- those things have no place in human-formed government. Oh, yeah- we make a big stink about them, talk like we mean to have them and we are all about fair and just, but when it comes down to it, well…you decide. Do you think that our system of justice is honoring the Torah or ignoring it?

When the Jews came out of Egypt, totally under the command and totally obedient to God alone (well, maybe not totally but usually?), we enjoyed living under His sovereign rule and had His divine protection. During the times of the Judges (about 5 Centuries or so after Joshua died), the book of Judges tells us that men did whatever they saw as right. It wasn’t pretty.

Then, as I referenced above, Samuel is told by God to anoint Shaul (Saul) as king: this was the first step to kicking God out of our lives.

Moving forward a few thousands years, we have many religions, all trying to kill each other, and we have many states and countries with different forms of government. Those that said they were for God and wanted to do God’s will are represented by the Crusades, the Inquisition and the Nazi party (yes, the Nazi Party- the belt buckles of the Nazi uniform said, “Gott mit uns”, which translates to “God is with us.”)

Historically, governments that said they were godly were just the opposite.

Today we have kicked God pretty much out of everything- out of the schools (no prayer allowed), out of the courthouse (take those 10 Commandments down- they are religious and we have separated state from church) and out of our families. Today when Jews marry someone of a different religion, it is the Jew that is usually converting. The “Nuclear Family” has done just what nuclear devices are designed to do- blow up. Eating dinner together around the table and sharing the day’s activities is a past relic.

And, as the Texas Supreme Court has upheld, people can legally kill their children. It reminds me of God commanding us not to worship Molech: the sacrifice to Molech, a god of the Semites, was to throw a young child, alive, into the fire. We may not be throwing our children into the fire, but we aren’t that far off- we are still killing them, just sooner than the ancients did.

The world is godless, as it should be- that is, if you believe in what Revelations tells us will happen. I see such horror and destruction- not just of things and people, but of spirit, justice and compassion. Our children grow up stealing cars and murdering prostitutes on the way (video game) or destroying and killing in war (video games, again.) They see violence, satanic beings that are really “okay”, and sexual impropriety every day on the TV and in the movies, and they have become inured to the horror of it all.

They are being prepared for the enemy to rule them.

This is God’s plan, people- this is what is supposed to happen. It ain’t nice, it ain’t pretty, and it is going to get worse- MUCH worse: be prepared to be persecuted if you worship God.

Don’t expect to see justice and fair treatment in the world; at least, not the kind God wants.

The bowls are in the hands of the angels, and the seals are being torn off the scroll. We are going through it, we are about to experience it- can’t you see it coming?

The End Times prophecies aren’t prophecy any more- they are current events.

hands off = don’t care

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Another gossip column rant this morning- this time it’s not Dear Abby, but Ask Amy (Donna likes to read the newspapers, and with two papers I get twice as many word puzzles.)

The question this morning was asking how tough a parent should be with activities such as having your children learn piano, get all A’s in school, etc. The parent writing was raised in a strict Asian family with very little “kid” time, and the other parent is (the writer says) a ‘hands-off’ type.

Amy did OK, and ended up saying kids have their friends, and if you’re the Mom or Dad, you are NOT one of their friends, you’re their parent- act like one!

Amen to that, Sister!

Hands off is not allowing your children to grow- it is removing accountability and preventing them from learning there are limitations in life and in relationships; it keeps them from being able to be aware, and respectful, of other people. Allowing children to be unaccountable for their actions and words (or lack thereof, if that is the case) is not helping them at all. Yes, there are times when we need to remember that they are just children, and still learning, but that doesn’t mean to allow them to ignore the consequences of what they do. It means we need to make them experience the consequences with mercy and patience. God is a great example of doing that, being understanding and merciful when He knows that is best, and striking you down when that is what is needed. And always, always, always willing and able to forgive.

I tried to be a parent to my children when I visited them; they are from my previous life, which ended in divorce, but I never left them- only their mother. However, since she was a ‘hands off, let’s be friends, you’re just children’ type of mother, who never felt responsible or accountable for anything she did or said, they were growing up the same way. Because I tried to be a parent, they now have rejected me and I am not allowed to be a part of their life. It’s been almost 4 years since I was able to talk or even email my son, and about 7 years with my daughter. My 4-6 hours with them every other Sunday or Saturday for over 20 years did not match up against the 24/7/365 teachings from their mother.

Here’s one example of how hands off is not helping the kids, at all:

I was with my children, Alexandra was about 8 and Bryce was about 3, and we were walking across the street. I held Alex’s hand and told her to look both ways for traffic to make sure it was safe, and her reply was that she didn’t have to look because I was the parent and I was supposed to make sure she is safe. Of course, that is an accurate statement- I am the parent, I am supposed to protect them, but that doesn’t remove her responsibility to protect herself. How will she learn to be a protective parent when she grows up if she isn’t taught this now? That was my argument- what happens when they become adults? If they are not taught how to be one, does it magically come to them in a flash the moment they turn 18? Maybe when they turn 21 they suddenly know what to do?

Proverbs tells us many things about disciplining our children, and how God disciplines us because He loves us. I am not saying a parent that is not a disciplinarian doesn’t love their children, or that one who is Machiavellian in their attitude is the most loving of all. What I am saying is that ‘hands off’ is the same as ‘I don’t care’, and children will pick up on that. Oh, believe-you-me, they know! If you don’t show concern and discipline for them, they will stretch that inch into a light year. Even if you are “strict”, they will still try to get away with as much as they can- that is what being a child is all about. To stretch the limits, to push to the edge, and further, until they are reeled in. It is a parents obligation to their child to teach them the ropes, so to speak, and that means how to tie things up and how not to get all tied up. A rope can lift you up or it can hang you: it all depends on knowing how to use it correctly.

I believe that the world is falling into satanic control, more and more each day. Look at the video games- violent, demonic, totally unconcerned for human rights or dignity. Look at the TV shows- sexual improprieties, killing, “justified” violence to each other, and just plain stupid…and I mean, REALLY stupid!

Look at the advertisements our children see on TV and in the magazines- people are sexual objects, products make you a better person, the more you have the more popular you will be. All focused on material items, which is all the enemy of God can offer. God doesn’t care about material things- He cares about our eternal soul.  Yeshua tells us to seek first the kingdom of God, and all these other things (what we need to survive while alive) will be given to us.

If you have kids, I am happy for you. I know you may not always feel that way for yourself, but as someone who has lost his children to hatred and unforgiveness (for the record, I wasn’t “Mr. Right”, either. I was no “Father Knows Best”, believe me) you should be grateful for being able to raise your children.

So raise them correctly, teaching them with proper levels of discipline, always tempered with forgiveness, love, mercy and patience. And remember-like it or not, this IS how it is- you are their example. They will not accept “Do as I say and not as I do” because no one does! They will be like you because your are in their very DNA, and what is good about you they have, and what is bad about you they have, also. And they will also have what is uniquely theirs. Appreciate their uniqueness and help them learn to develop it.

Hand off is (and I won’t accept any argument to the contrary) no different than saying you don’t care. It is condemning them to death (that’s what Proverbs tells us happens if we don’t discipline our children), and what parent wants to do that?

 

Aspirin for the Soul

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Is there anyone out there without some level of pain in their soul? I know the pain of missing my children, who have been torn from me by a hateful and unforgiving mother I divorced nearly a quarter of a century ago. I visited the children every weekend for the first couple of years (I lived a 1 1/2 hour drive away, if there was no NY traffic. And there’s no such thing as “no traffic” when talking about New York City), took them to the beach, to parks, to movies. I spent money I didn’t have at first, and when I did have money, I spent more of it on them. I did all I could to teach them to be self-aware, considerate and able to get along with others. It was all against what their mother had taught them, which was that they are the center of everything, they are just children so they aren’t responsible for themselves; if they have a reason ‘why’ that is a valid excuse so they don’t have to be responsible for what they do, don’t do, say or don’t say. And as soon as they reached majority, even though we still sent them money, they decided that they didn’t need to have me in their lives anymore. I was treating them as adults, not excusing them, and trying to get them to see how what they had been taught would make them outcasts. So I became the outcast.

It hurts. It has been nearly 4 years since my son disowned me, and about 7 for my daughter. She will be 29 next month, and he will be 24 in October. I still send them birthday cards, remind them how much I miss them and still love them, and ask for reconciliation. At whatever level they are comfortable with. I don’t know what is going on in their lives, and what really kills me is that I know, without a doubt, that if (God forbid) something serious happened, or even if they died, their mother wouldn’t even tell me.

That’s my biggest hurt, and it is a big one, isn’t it? Yet I go on. I don’t mope, I don’t complain (well, not nearly as much as I used to) and I tell you this now only to demonstrate that there is hope for those who have this kind of hurt.

It is the hope we have in Messiah, the knowledge that God loves everyone, and in the power of prayer.

I pray for my children, and I pray for their mother. Yes, I do, and I mean it, which surprised me more than anyone when I started doing it. That is the aspirin for our soul- forgiveness. The pain of being hurt is never going to go away if we review it, rehearse what we want to say to the person who has hurt us, and refuse to accept that they must be hurting, inside, even more than they hurt us to do such a terrible thing. That’s what really got me on the right track- when I thought about the pain she was going through, the hurt, the feeling of desertion and rejection, which is what I was doing. Yes- I was leaving her. I had many, many good reasons for doing that, and even though I was no longer in love with her, I still waited for two years before divorcing her, legally. That was time for her to do T’shuvah, to turn from her prideful hatred and decide which was more important- the marriage or her pridefulness.

We all know what decision she made.

So, what did I have left except the pain? I had more pain to come- constant berating by her every time I visited, my children repeating the foul accusations she made against me and my parents to my face when I was with them, and many other atrocities.

I am so grateful to God and the Ruach HaKodesh for teaching me that the only way to overcome the pain of this situation was to pray for them and forgive them, only after doing that could I ask His forgiveness for them.

Oh, now- don’t get the wrong idea. This wasn’t something that came to me right away: it took years and years for me to get to the point where I didn’t talk about it all the time to anyone unfortunate enough to be within earshot. Then it took years after I was saved for me to realize that forgiveness was the only way to relieve the pain. The pain persists, so long as the reason for it persists, but forgiveness and prayer is how I deaden and dull the pain. It is my hope for the future and my trust in God to do all He will to help turn my children back to me (although I know that it has to be their decision), and when I think of the pain and suffering that her hatefulness has caused her, all her life, I can’t help but feel pity for my “ex”.  No matter how much she has hurt me, I have God and the promise of eternal joy to look forward to. When I think of what she has to look forward to, how can I not pity her and pray for her salvation?

Even Ebeneezer Scrooge would have removed some of the chain that Jacob Marley had to wear, if he could have.

Forgiveness is the only way to stop the pain that we have when someone hurts us.

Proverbs tells us to feed and give water to our enemies, David showed respect and forgiveness to King Saul, sparing his life even though he was trying to take David’s; Yeshua tells us to leave our gift at the alter if there is any animosity between us and someone else, and also that we should love our enemies.

And Yeshua also tells us, in Matthew 6:14-15, that if we do not forgive, we will not be forgiven. That’s a hard word to hear, but it is essential we understand it. Forgiveness has nothing to do, really, with the person we forgive, and everything to do with our relationship with God. When anyone sins it is, first and foremost, a sin against God. David knew that and says so in Psalm 51. The person who sins against another is sinning against God. That needs to be worked out between them, and nothing we do will make much of a difference. God will not forgive them if they do not ask for it, no matter how often we ask for it.

So, then ,why should we ask for their forgiveness? Because it is important to maintain our proper relationship with God, that’s why. Because we need to forgive them to stop the pain, that’s why. Because we are commanded to forgive, that’s why!

To err is human; to forgive, divine. That is a truth that is not written in the bible, but is exactly what the bible teaches us.

We all have some pain- how can we possibly avoid it living in a cursed world?  So what? Pain is part of life: for a headache we take aspirin, for a backache we take Ibuprofen, and for the heartache of being sinned against, we take a daily dose of prayer with a glassful of forgiveness.

Forgiveness is aspirin for your soul, and prayer is the way to administer it. Pray for those who hate you, forgive those who sin against you, and you will survive the pain.

And besides that, you will please God, who will bless you for your obedience.

That’s a pretty good remedy: you forgive, which relieves the pain, and then you receive blessings from God.

 

Parashah Acarey Mot (After the death) Leviticus 16 – 18

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After the death, as in, after the death of Aaron’s two sons, who came before the Lord with unknown fire, drunk and ambitious. They learned the hard way you shouldn’t “Drink and Daven!”

Chapter 16 deals with the preparation and ceremonies for Yom Kippur, specifically regarding the preparations and duties of the High Priest (Cohen HaGadol.) The other chapters deal with slaying of animals and improper relationships, specifically improper sexual relationships.

From Chapter 18 to the end of Leviticus must be read to understand the origins of all that Yeshua taught us. These chapters deal with relationships between each other, which (ultimately) affect our relationship with God, and cover both familial and social relationships.

Chapter 16 teaches us that we must prepare ourselves before coming to God by cleansing our own sin, and the sin within our household. Many, if not most, Believing families aren’t composed of generations of Believers on both sides, so (in reality) I feel safe in saying that we all have close family members and friends that do not share our beliefs. Maybe they go to church or synagogue every week, and observe their holidays, but they haven’t really accepted Yeshua as their Messiah or really done T’shuvah. Although we must clean ourselves of sin, we can’t just destroy every relationship we have with an unbelieving person; in fact, we should not disown them because they are living in darkness and we are supposed to be the light for them.

We can ‘clean our house’ by not condoning or enabling sin. If we have a child that rejects God, when in your house he or she must not blaspheme or insult God, and the rules you live by as a God-fearing person must be obeyed by everyone in your house. What someone does on their own, outside of your home, is their business; but, if they live in your house, while they are there they will honor your beliefs and not sin.

You want to do drugs, fornicate, drink to excess?  Go somewhere else to do it, and I refuse to help. If you get stuck somewhere, find your own way home. When you are in this house I will treat you well, but if you leave it to sin then find your own way back or sleep on the street.

This isn’t mamby-pampy love; if you are the type of parent who says about your child, “Not my Baby! My Baby is a good boy/girl” as the cops drag them away, you need to clean your house! Actually, you need to wake up and clean the sin out of your own heart!

Yeshua tells us, clearly, that family can get in the way of having a clean heart and house:

Luke 9:62-“No one who puts a hand to the plow and looks back is fit for service in the kingdom of God.”

Luke 14:26- “If anyone comes to me and does not hate father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters—yes, even their own life—such a person cannot be my disciple.”

Matthew 10:34-37- “Do not suppose that I have come to bring peace to the earth. I did not come to bring peace, but a sword. 35 For I have come to turn ‘a man against his father, a daughter against her mother, a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law—36   a man’s enemies will be the members of his own household.’ 37 “Anyone who loves their father or mother more than me is not worthy of me; anyone who loves their son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me.”

These are tough lessons for us, but necessary ones.

Look, I’m not telling you to divorce your spouse and kick your child out into the streets, then quit your job, tell all your non-Believing friends to hit the road and ask the Pastor if you can sleep in the sanctuary from now on. What I am saying is that you need to recognize the sin in yourself and your “house”, meaning the relationships in your life, whether they are intimate, familial or public and keep them as clean as you can. Do not sin, hate the sin but love the sinner, and make sure that everyone you know knows where you stand, which is on God’s side.

Joshua told the Israelites that he and his family will serve the Lord. Can you say the same thing? Maybe you can’t because not all of your family are saved, but you can keep your house clean by being the example that God wants you to be and not enabling or condoning sinfulness.

I lost my children to their mother’s unforgiveness, hatred and spite because I refused to allow my children (whether I was visiting them or they were visiting me) to do what was wrong, to be disrespectful to adults or God, and to act sinfully. Their mother didn’t care, and that didn’t make it any easier for me. I lost my children because of what she has done, and also because of what I did. But I know that what I did was right in God’s eyes, and although it hurts today (and always will) I can suffer with the loss because I want to be what God says we should be. I pray that one day God will send angels to show my children the truth and we will be reconciled, to each other and to God, so that we can be Mishpocha (family) centered on Adonai.

Being right is never easy and, since the world is wrong, being right also means being separated from the world.

You know what? Being holy also means to be separated from the world, so although it is tough, often lonely, usually persecuted one way or another, being holy is what we are supposed to be, and these chapters in Leviticus, from 18 to the end, tell us how to be holy.

If you think that the Old Covenant is not needed anymore because Yeshua is all we need, think again- these next chapters are, essentially, the main lessons that Yeshua taught.

John said that the Word became flesh- the only “word” was Torah, and the flesh it became is Yeshua. So, if Yeshua, being the Living Torah, is still alive then Torah is still alive.

Think about that the next time someone says the Old Covenant is only for Jews.

 

Parashah Tatzria (She Delivers) Leviticus 12 and 13

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These two chapters continue in the sections of Leviticus that deal with cleanliness and uncleanliness. Chapter 11 started with food, Chapter 12 deals with the cleanliness of a woman after giving birth and Chapter 13 with skin disorders, specifically leprosy (in Hebrew it’s called Tza’arat.)

Chapter 12 says that a woman is unclean after giving birth just as she is considered unclean during her time of Niddah. Chapter 13 says that when someone is suspected of having Tza’arat, they must go to the Cohen to have him inspect it, he will determine if it is Tza’arat or not (the chapter outlines the diagnostic methods), then (if and) when the person is declared clean, what sacrifices are to be made to allow them back into the community and the Temple.

I am not going to discuss the specifics of what is discussed in these chapters because there is a more important issue that these mitzvot (laws) have generated over the centuries. That issue is about our questioning the reason for these laws. We ask why these laws are given; we ask if they are for health reasons (physical) or for religious reasons (ceremonial); we even ask if they are valid or necessary now that we have better standards of inspection for disease with regards to meat being sold and better methods of disinfection and disease control.

What I want to know is why?- why do we think we have the right to question God? What makes us think we can ask God “Why” He gives us laws, and even worse, question if God’s laws are really necessary or valid anymore.

I am not saying  we shouldn’t ever question God. That’s just silly. Job questioned God (of course, the answers fell on him like a ton of bricks, but he did get answers), Gideon questioned God, Moses questioned God, Abraham questioned God, ….get the point? The point is that all these great men questioned God, but not in a manner that raised doubts about whether or not God had the right to do what He did or whether or not what God said was valid or really necessary.

There are good questions for God, and there are bad ones. The good questions could be:

  1. Why do bad things happen to good people?
  2. What do you want from me? How can I better serve you?
  3. When will you answer my prayers?
  4. Who is the Messiah?

Then there are the bad questions:

  1. Why do I have to do this?
  2. Is this law really necessary anymore?
  3. Who are you to tell me I have to do this?
  4. If I am saved by the blood of Jesus why do I still have to obey these “ceremonial” laws?

Can you see the difference between these questions? If not I didn’t do a good job of giving examples- what I want to show is that we can question God about His plans and what He is doing and why He does things but when we question the validity of His laws or His authority to issue them, we are out of line.

Shaul (that nice Jewish boy from Tarsus who makes the tents) addressed this in his second letter to Timothy, 3:16:

All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness.

And in the Gospels, John 14:21  Yeshua tells us what it means to love Him:

Whoever has my commands and keeps them is the one who loves me. The one who loves me will be loved by my Father, and I too will love them and show myself to them

And Yeshua also told us in Matthew 24:35:

Heaven and earth will pass away, but my words will never pass away

All these scriptures point to the fact that God doesn’t change, and His word doesn’t change, and if we love Him we will do as He says not because it’s healthy, or for some arcane religious ceremonial need, but because we love Him. We do what He tells us as a labor of love, not as a forced activity to prevent going to hell. We do what God says without questioning His authority or reasons for giving these laws to us because He is God and we are not; He’s the boos, He’s the Man! He’s the one who leads, we are the ones who follow.

Isaiah 45:9 also addresses this issue of wrongful questions to God :

Woe to those who quarrel with their Maker, those who are nothing but potsherds among the potsherds on the ground. Does the clay say to the potter, ‘What are you making?’ Does your work say, ‘The potter has no hands’

We need to do what Yeshua said we should when He told us to change and become like little children, otherwise we will never enter the Kingdom of God (you can look this one up yourselves.) What He meant was that we need to accept, unquestioning and faithfully, what God tells us to do. How many times in the Tanakh do we read how Moses told the people to obey God to receive His blessings and life? Not just for them, but for their children, too!

I ask God a lot of questions, but I never ask Him to justify what He does or what He has told me I should do. That is just plain disrespectful, and certainly not faithful.

Do you love someone a lot? I mean, “fall down on your face and kiss the ground they walk on” love them? If you do, and they asked you to do something for them, would you ask them why you had to?

God gives us laws, regulations, ordinances and commandments- what’s the difference? Who cares? If you love Him and trust Him to tell you to do only what is good for you, then faithfully obey, do it as a labor of love, and trust that whether you can understand why God says to do something or not, He always tells us what to do because it is good for us.

Thessalonians 4:7-8  says this:

God has called us to live holy lives, not impure lives. Therefore, anyone who refuses to live by these rules is not disobeying human teaching but is rejecting God, who gives his Holy Spirit to you

Question God all you want about how to do those things He says to do better; question God all you want in order to serve Him more completely; question God all you want to help better understand His plans for you. But don’t question His authority, don’t question the validity of His commandments, and certainly don’t question God’s right to tell us what we should do.

God is our Father, we are His children, and children should do as their parents tell them. Proverbs says that when we teach our children what to do they will always return to that path. Believe it when I tell you that God only wants what is best for His children, and show that trust and love by doing as He says without questioning why.