Tag: giving

Give the Gift of Giving

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Messiah did so much for us, didn’t He? He exchanged His royal robe of divinity to put on a stinking mantle of flesh; He left the idyllic heavens to come to a cursed earth; He lived a life of trouble (Isaiah 53) and knew all the strife, emotional pain and physical wants of a human being; and, finally, He submitted to indescribable pain and torture just to be nailed to a tree. All of that in order that we unworthy sinners may have a chance to escape eternal damnation, which we all deserve, anyway.

Yeshua (Jesus) is certainly one man who knew all about giving to others, because He did all that with no expectation of getting anything back. He gave all He had and it brings Him great joy to see us receive it.

We are told in Acts 20:35 that Yeshua said it is better to give than to receive, but when we receive something do we do so in a way that blesses the giver? What I mean is this: using myself as an example, I used to feel very guilty and obligated when anyone would do something nice for me, or give me something. That is a worldly viewpoint- give and then expect to get back. When we invite someone to a party, do we do so because we enjoy their company or because we expect they will invite us to their next party? When we give a gift at a party to the host (birthday, baby shower, etc.) do we do so with the expectation that they will give something back to us at our next event?

If so, then we are not giving, we are investing. We are spending our money and hoping to receive back something worth as much or more. How many times have you heard people complain that they give nice things to someone but get less than what they gave back when it’s their turn to receive? Hopefully you haven’t, which means you hang out with the right crowd, but I know there are people like that out there.

Yeshua tells us that when we are asked for something we should give, freely and without expectation of reward or return (Matthew 5:40-42):

And if anyone would sue you and take your tunic, let him have your cloak as well.  And if anyone forces you to go one mile, go with him two miles. Give to the one who begs from you, and do not refuse the one who would borrow from you.

When I give something to someone, such as treat them to dinner, or give them a gift, I do so without wanting anything in return. That said, I do expect a nice “Thank you”, of course, but even if that is not given, it doesn’t change the fact that I wanted to give because I wanted to give. And when I give something, I do not want the recipient to feel obligated to return the favor. I want them to receive as happily as I give.

That is the giving the gift of giving- to let someone give to you freely and wholeheartedly without worrying that you will feel obligated by receiving it.

Yeshua gave all, we give (most of the time) what we can, and sometimes we give a lot (if you have kids you know what I mean), and when we do so without any expectation of return and without wanting anything back, giving only to please the receiver of our gift, then we are giving correctly.

Subsequently, if you feel really good inside when you give to someone, let the person who gives to you feel the same way. When you are given a gift, don’t refuse it, don’t say, “Oh- you shouldn’t have!” or indicate in any way that you feel obligated to return the favor or are concerned by receiving the gift. Accept it with great joy (even if it is one that you can’t bear to own) and thank the person.

You may ask me, “Steve- I understand what you are saying but what if the person giving me the gift expects something in return, like most people do?” Well, my answer is give them something, if you want to because you want to give it. Do not give them something as an obligation or because they expect something back- if they don’t give for ‘giving’s sake’ then that is their problem. Those who give to receive will learn fast enough that you are a giver without expectation of return, and a receiver without obligation to give something back.

I have found most of the time when you give to people without expectation of return, they sense it; it all depends on your attitude. I will tell people I treat or to whom I give a nice gift to please do not feel any obligation to return the favor because my joy comes from seeing them enjoying the gift.

This is what the bible says:

Proverbs 11:24-27- One person is generous and yet grows more wealthy, but another withholds more than he should and comes to poverty. A generous person will be enriched, and the one who provides water for others will himself be satisfied

Proverbs 23:6-8- Do not eat the food of a stingy person, do not crave his delicacies; for he is like someone calculating the cost in his mind. “Eat and drink,” he says to you, but his heart is not with you; you will vomit up the little bit you have eaten, and will have wasted your pleasant words.

2 Corinthians 9:7-10- You must each decide in your heart how much to give. And don’t give reluctantly or in response to pressure. “For God loves a person who gives cheerfully.

Therefore, when you receive something from someone, whether its a gift, money, time, possession, love, whatever it is: do so without concern about returning it or feeling obligated. Appreciate their giving and bless them in allowing them to feel the wonderful joy of giving.

If you receive happily and thankfully, you will have given them the gift of giving.

 

Too selfish to receive

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‘Tis the season for giving. In Acts (20:35) we are told that Yeshua said it is better to give than to receive, and we also are told in 2 Corinthians (9:6-7) that God loves a cheerful giver. So, it is pretty clear that we should give generously and cheerfully when we give to others.

Being a generous giver means that we give for the love of giving, and for the hope that what we give will help, edify and please the receiver.

The world, however, is not a generous giver- the world teaches us that what we give should be considered as a sampling of what the other person should, sooner or later, give us back.  Maybe that’s why so many give something they want for themselves becasue they hope the receiver will “get the hint”?

On the other hand, that doesn’t explain why fruit cakes get passed around like a hot potato.

What the world teaches us about giving is that when we receive something we need to make sure we give back something of equal or better value. The world teaches us to receive a gift wrapped with a sense of obligation. It is never “cheerful” if you give something with the expectation that you will receive something back. That is not giving- that is called “investing”. You invest some money to get more money back, and you invest some time to receive a benefit greater than the value of the time you invested. However, it is wrong to give a gift in order to receive something similar or better at some later date. If you do, then you are not a cheerful giver: what you are is a sinful, selfish and manipulative louse.

“Hey!! Ease up, Steve!”

Sorry if you feel a little offended, but like it or not, that’s the truth; if it hits home then you need to think about what Yeshua said regarding giving. He should know. After all, He gave His life willingly so that you could have a chance to live with God, eternally. He doesn’t expect you to give your life to Him in exchange out of obligation, but He hopes you do. And not out of obligation, but out of thankfulness and as an opportunity to allow what He did to become useful in your life. He wants you to accept His sacrificice, His gift to you, for your sake and not for His.

Here’s the really hard part for humans, who (as I say above) have been taught by the world that when you receive something you owe something back to the giver: it is very hard for us to receive as generously as we give.

When you receive a gift that you think is disproportionate to your gift, do you feel “guilty”? Do you feel that you did not perform as you should have? Even if the gift you gave is appropriate, useful and appreciated?  If you feel this way, then you are too worried about the world’s view and not about God’s view. You need to “give” the other person gifting you the true joy of giving. You need to “give” the other person the joy that you feel when you give with no expectation of return. You need to accept the gift with the same joy you feel when you give a gift, and not feel any obligation to return anything.

If the other person is upset that you didn’t give proportionate to their gift, or that you didn’t bring them anything at all, then that’s their problem. And if you have been giving gifts to a friend and their children at holiday times and they always have an excuse for not giving you anything, then give them one more gift: give them the guilt-free gift of telling them you don’t give to receive, you give to give and that the only one you want to impress is God by cheerfully sharing the blessings He has given to you with those you care for.

God wants us to share that which He has provided for us. If you have more than someone else has, give them some of what you have that they can use. Give it freely, give it cheerfully, and give it without expectation of receipt. If you give to others without any desire to receive back, you will receive something- you will receive blessings from the Lord.

And let me tell you something- what the Lord will bless you with won’t be found at Macy’s, can’t be ordered from E-Bay, and will never be available on Amazon.  What the Lord will bless you with will be peace of spirit, joy of giving, love of your fellow-man (and woman), and rewards in heaven.

That’s a lot better than free shipping!

The More You Give Away, The More He Gives You!

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God just never seems to run out of good stuff, does He? He sends blessings down, He sends the rain, He provides for us financially, emotionally, and even physically. He has enough patience to fill a bottomless hole, and when He gives us all these wonderful things, what He really wants us to do is to share them with those that He did not give them to.

In Acts 4:32 we read how every one of the new Believers shared all they had with each other. In 2 Corinthians, 9:7 we are told that God loves a cheerful giver, and in the Tanakh we are told that we must leave the edges of the fields untouched, and not to go back and shake the trees a second time or pick grapes a second time. These are to be left for the poor and needy who will be gleaning the fields.

God interacts in our lives often through using other people than the miraculous intervention of angels. As such, we who are given much must share what we have with others. Yeshua tells us that we will always have the poor with us, and I believe this is why: God directly blesses some, but doesn’t bless others, so that that they will be available to those of  us who have received blessings in order to allow us to bless them. God is doing a double-blessing: what He gives to us we are to share with those He has not given to, so that all can share and be blessed. As such, when we cheerfully give to those less blessed, we are blessed in the giving, they are blessed in the receiving, and God is honored and glorified. A true win-win-win situation.

And here’s the kicker: God will resupply us! He never runs out of good stuff.

There is a caveat: be wise and use discretion in your giving. Just because a charity seems legit doesn’t mean it is, and if you see someone on the street begging, giving them money may be enabling their sin, not helping them overcome it.

I will not give money to someone who is begging, which is (in fact) easier to do than what I do. I will find a store and buy them something to eat and drink. If I give them something to eat and drink, and they are grateful, then I know that I am helping them to survive another day. If they don’t seem grateful, then I know that I have not helped them get more of what they really wanted, most likely money for drugs or alcohol. Still, they will eat what I have given them so despite themselves, I get to bless them and they get to be blessed.

Donna and I contribute to charities that are important to us, we tithe (not just what is comfortable for us to tithe, either) and we contribute our time volunteering with groups that interest us. No, we don’t work the soup kitchens, although we never sell what we are “downsizing” but instead donate it to charity. We both volunteer at the Brevard Zoo and Donna volunteers at a local wildlife hospital. Sharing blessings doesn’t have to be exclusively with humans: remember, God also put us in charge of the Earth and all it’s inhabitants, whether animal, vegetable or mineral. Not just humans.

Are you blessed? Do you really believe that God has given you all you need to survive? If you can look at yourself and say that you actually are pretty well off, but you haven’t really given that much to the poor and needy, please start to share more of what you have. I am not saying to sell everything and give it to your church- God forbid! I don’t think that is right at all. I think you need to tithe, and if you aren’t sure if you really want to give a full tithe to where you worship, split it between different Godly activities. Anything that cares for people, animals or the environment is taking care of that which God created and put us in charge of.

Here are some conundrums regarding blessings that can only be true with God:

– if you want more, give more away

– if you need more, ask for less

– if you want less, you will get more

– if you share your wealth, you will be wealthier

Sounds crazy, doesn’t it? But, then again, God makes the wise seems foolish (1 Corinthians 1:27) and the ways of the world are not God’s ways.

Don’t be stingy, don’t be selfish, don’t have a “dark” eye (Matthew 6) and let the blessings that flow to you flow through you to others.

I guarantee that if you do unto others as you would have them do unto you, you will never feel alone, or unappreciated, or bad about yourself.

Giving to others is the greatest gift that God has given to you. Use it.

Can You Take as Well as You Give?

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We are told it is better to give than to receive, and that is true. However, it is often harder for us to receive with as much compassion and joy as it is to give.

Why is that? I’m not sure, but I am willing to bet it’s because giving can be a power trip and an ego boost: the person giving is in a position of authority and strength greater than the one receiving. The one receiving, therefore, feels obligated to reciprocate at some point in the future.

It’s like the opening scene in The Godfather, when Don Corleone gets back at the men who attacked the Mortician’s daughter- then, when Sonny needed “repair” work after being shot to pieces, the Don called back this favor. The Mortician had no choice but to comply.

I have taught myself to accept gifts as graciously as I want to give them. I remind myself that I like to share the blessings God has given me, and the bible also says that God loves a cheerful giver (I think that really refers to giving to God, although Yeshua said what we do to the least of these, His brethren, we do to Him, so giving cheerfully to others is always good.) Remembering this fact helps me to be as gracious a receiver as it does a giver, allowing me to let the giver be cheerful and fully enjoy his or her ability to give.

What if the other person is really only giving to be on an ego trip? What if they expect something back? Then what do you do?

You do the same thing- you let them give you what they want to, accept it cheerfully and gratefully, and don’t worry or even think about why they are giving it to you. It doesn’t matter, in the least. Yeshua also said that if someone asks for a shirt, give him a cloak, too. If you are asked to carry a soldiers pack for a mile, carry it for two. We give not to receive, and we accept to let others give with the same godly purpose. If their purpose is not godly, then by receiving their gift without a sense of obligation, in a way, we give them the opportunity to know what it is like to give correctly.

We who are Believers do what we do to please God, not people. When we give, we give without expectation of reward or reciprocation. If you can’t do that, then it is better you don’t give at all. And when we receive, we should receive with the same sense of gratitude to God for providing the blessings we get, whether or not it comes from a human or is delivered by a dove flying in our window. If everything belongs to God, then it stands to reason that everything we receive is from God. Right? So, we accept gratefully and graciously, without guilt or need to reciprocate.

If someone gives something to you and expects to get something back, that’s their problem. If they get angry or tell you you owe them something back, if you can return what they gave you, do so. If it is not possible to return it, tell them you gave them back your appreciation and blessings for their generosity. Then it would be best not to accept anything else from them, if for no other reason than to not do anything to cause them to stumble into sin.

Sometimes I feel that people don’t accept God’s grace for the same reason they don’t want to take anything from people- they feel obligated to give something back. The truth is, we are expected to do something in exchange for the gift of salvation- we are expected to stop sinning. Salvation is available to everyone, but it isn’t really “free”: it costs us nothing to accept it but it does cost something to keep it. It costs us our sin because we need to change our way of living to remain saved. We need to do T’Shuvah and turn from our sin once we have accepted God’s Grace. We are expected to give back to God the obedience He asks of us in exchange for the salvation He offers us.

Salvation is not unconditional, and it is not free. And it is irrevocable; that means only that God will not ask for it back, but we can throw it away!

Salvation is not free. It cost Yeshua His divinity, and later His life. When we take on salvation, we are expected to give back to God the obedience He requires and to give up our sinful ways. There is a cost to us, and it is going to come from our worldly existence: friends, family, maybe even jobs, promotions, whatever the world sees as valuable we will probably not have the same opportunities to receive when we choose to live a godly life. In the End Days, accepting salvation and keeping it may cost us our very lives, just as it did Yeshua.

But when you think about what we will ultimately receive, we are still way ahead in this deal. In fact, life itself is just a mist: grass in the field that is alive today and dried out and dead tomorrow. Yet eternity is forever and ever and ever. Eternity has no end, so we receive eternal joy and peace and what we are expected to give back is, comparatively, really nothing.

In the long run, even though being a godly person in a sinful world is costly in many ways, salvation is so much more than anything the world can offer, it is still a gift.

It’s like when someone gives you a kitten or a puppy, you have an obligation to care for it and it will cost you to do so, but you get back so much more that it will always feel like a gift.

That’s what salvation is like, and that’s why we should accept everything we get as coming from God; as such, accept it graciously, gratefully, without guilt and always give without expectation of return.

The greater your cheerful giving (and receiving) on Earth, the greater will be your reward in heaven.